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Doing Things Differently (Rerun)
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Doing Things Differently (Rerun) Sorry to offer up another rerun but I hate these being lost at the bottom of the page. This story is way too true. I did google Katie and may have found her. I wouldn't intrude on her life, it's just enticing to know where she is. Enjoy Doing Things Differently Prof |
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So in a fun little post in Hydragenia's blog she asked what one thing I would do different in my life. My cheap shot at a laugh was, "Katie C. in my senior year of high school. Coincidentally, that happened to be the truth. I was green as grass. Very little experience with girls. A few little kisses that I could have gotten away with in front of the girls parents with out causing them undo alarm. Then I got a date with Katie. I only figured out she would like to go out because a mutual friend managed to beat me repeatedly over the head with a large club until the thought snuck in. Katie: funny, smart, cute, artistic, playful. It was oh so grown up. Nice dinner at a banquet, acting like we thought "grown ups" would act. After dinner and the awards ceremony, what to do? We drove. And drove. And drove. Cruising downtown. Circling again and again. Don't get me wrong, we were having a great time talking. Speculating what our lives would be like after high school, what we thought of a hundred different things. We must have killed 3/4 of a tank of gas in my Dad's car. He must have thought I took her out of state. Some how the suggestion came up that we didn't have to drive all the time, we could park. Park? I'm sure Katie must have made the suggestion, I can't imagine it was mine. Well in my hometown there was only one place to park. Even I knew of it but had never been there. So we started driving up the bluff overlooking the whole city. And it started to rain and lightning. The thunder shook the whole car. We must have been making witty teasing remarks about the "goings on" in the cars by the side of the road we were passing has we climbed up the bluff to the park at the top. Somehow my arm was around Katie as we drove. I don't remember the details of the teasing except for one. But I do so remember that one. When Katie said, "Well you know you can't the willing..." I thought my heart would never resume beating. I was 17 with a total of 8 or 10 kisses to my credit. What is she saying??? Is she suggesting what I think she's suggesting? My mind couldn't get around the concept. But I did know the end of the road, the park at the top of the hill was getting close. And I didn't have a clue what to do....... The rain was pouring, the wipers were on high as I pulled into a vacant parking slot. Gear shift goes into park. Headlights off, (gee, do you think those already parked would have preferred I turn them off earlier?) Ignition off. Turn to Katie, my arm still around her shoulders. The thought of leaning toward her for a kiss finally penetrating my mind. And..... Katie pushes against me, shoving me against the door as her tongue plunges into my mouth. I will be forever grateful that it was very dark except for the lightning so she didn't see the fact that my eyes were roughly the size of soccer balls. This was a warm wet tongue buried deep in my mouth.......and it wasn't mine. I was certainly no one to judge quality of french kisses back then but I suspect she was a bit weak on style points but rated a 10 for effort. It's funny that I'm not completely clear on why this didn't go past making out. And let me be very precise, this was a make out session that can still raise my pulse 29 years later. We were parked on top of the bluff for two or three hours as a storm raged and moved on. Arms around each other. Kissing and talking and kissing some more. And it was truly lovely kissing. It was so wonderful it didn't really occur to me to try for more. We kissed, we hugged....we hugged so tight. No one copped a feel or moved hands underneath clothing. The quip Katie made earlier didn't reappear. It was like being in a different world. By the time Katie suggested she'd be in trouble with her folks if she didn't get home soon, it must have been between 2 and 3 in the morning. My tongue and jaw ached, literally, with the last hours efforts. A good ache mind you. I drove down the bluff. Drove her home. We kissed quickly at her door as it was still raining. We went out a time or two more. The parking didn't repeat itself. Then off to different colleges. Haven't seen her since 1977. What would I do different? I've imagined since then many scenarios that would make popular copy on many blogs around here. Would I try for more? Part of me longs to. Part of me wonders if the memory would be as vivid and fine if there was some rather clumsy first time sex involved. Katie is only my own archetypal example of what I'd change. What would I change? I'd take more risks. I'd be willing to be rejected. I'd have sown some wild oats before marriage. When I married I believed there was some of that bluff top passion yet to come. But there hasn't been. Not in a long time anyway. Work, kids, yards, relatives, births, deaths. "You know you can't the willing......." The willing have gone away....... faded away.... are no longer willing. And I didn't take a shot when I could have. Now I can't, or more accurately won't. I think about it often. Guess that's why I flirt and post and read blogs and imagine what all those women and couples are enjoying...that I'm not. What would I change with Katie, if I knew then what I know now? The kisses would still be deep and wet. But the hands would begin to explore. Coy would grow brazen. Clothes would be moved, pushed aside. "Sex?' "Not without a condom, but have you ever....?" A sly grin as I slide lower. Katie giggles and settles herself in the corner made by the seat and car door. Yeah, I'd do some things differently. Then I might wonder less about what I don't have. I still might not have it, but that might be more of a choice rather than a "situation." Yes, I'd do Katie differently. Prof
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I Googled her a few years back but couldn't track her down. I remember reading about your losing you V-card in your blog. It was a delightful and exciting tale. Prof
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